Saber partir

Suéltame ya
te pido por favor
que no vuelvas más
mi maleta lista está
y ya no hay marcha atrás
nunca pensaste que fuera yo
quien pondría el punto final
sin mucho qué decir
esta historia ha de acabar
es tiempo de partir
déjame olvidar.
 
Si fuiste tú quien quiso renunciar
por qué venir ahora a recordar
el daño hecho está
y nada volverá a comenzar
ya lo decidiste tú
debemos avanzar.
 
Y si yo me voy
y si tú te vas
y si nuestras miradas
jamás se vuelven a encontrar
será lo más sano para los dos
será que así se anule el dolor
de no tenerte aquí
de tener que decir adiós.
 
Y si no hay nada más
si la lluvia no cesa
y no volvemos jamás
a tener las respuestas
a este trágico final
que con sangre he de firmar
vete por favor
déjame solo
que no te guardo rencor
pero tu voz es algo
que no quiero recordar.
begone

“Be gone”. Fotografía propia. 

Goodbye New York

I’ll pack a bit later
let me enjoy leaves as they fall
as Norah cries on the radio
while she sings a sad song
Manhattan will be waiting for me, I know
and this letters will remain on the floor
autumn will be here again, I know
but you… you won’t.
 
[Chorus A]
 
So goodbye New York
bye bye my love
old streets and new hopes
maybe one day you will know
that I miss you so
specially in the nights of snow
when you’re laying next to someone.
 
My tea’s getting colder
maybe I left a window open
so the wind will be my company
since the cat ran away last week
stories will be written, I know
and my name will be in some corridor
I’ll think of you in each airport
but you… you won’t think of me anymore.
 
[Chorus A]
 
So goodbye New York
bye bye my love
old streets and new hopes
maybe one day you will know
that I miss you so
specially in the nights of snow
when you’re laying next to someone.
 
[Chorus B]
 
So goodbye New York
bye bye to the ones I know
save a hug for my return
maybe we will laugh at this song
so everyone can actually know
that I still miss you so
specially in the nights of snow
even when I’m laying next to someone.
unknown

“Lights in Staten Island where I wrote this song”. Fotografía propia. 

The Other Man

I’m scared I must admit
my body shakes
my mind is blurry
my eyes can say the honest truth
and I’m not even ready
not over you.
 
I’m scared I must admit
my hands revolving
my heart is jumping
don’t know what to do or what to say
just by seeing you there
my world will fade.
 
[Chorus A]
 
And I’m not trying to impress you
or to even say that I’m ok
I’m just trying to make it simple
a white flag to start again
as friends or strangers
our story will remain
without the sight of others
in the deepest of ourselves.
 
I’m afraid to even touch you
you were once my shelter
my secret threat
now that you’re just too far away
I’m a lonely walker
you’re an empty cave.
 
I’m afraid of my decisions
the steps I took went far away
regret is not an issue
that doesn’t mean I choose the best
mistakes may be my common race
losing or winning, don’t know it yet.
 
[Chorus B]
 
And I’m not trying to forgive you
or to even show that I’m ok
I’m just trying not to feel guilty
a white flag to quit the game
as foes or strangers
our story will hurt again
if we insist to play the cover
of that song kept in our shells.
 
[Bridge]
 
Oh and I thought you were going to be there
waiting for me, waiting just to say
goodbye once and for all
to sign the final chapter and burn the book
but no, you did not came
so I guess this is it
nice to meet you and walk away.
 
[Chorus C]
 
And I’m not trying to believe you
or to even think that you’re ok
I’m just trying to clean this mess
a crime scene where love is dead
as victims or offenders
our treachery will be paid
you as the coward who ran
me as the other man.
hat

“Dick’s Hat” by Trina. 2012.

Dejar la luz entrar

Tumbado a la orilla
de otra duda sin explicar
mirando hacia arriba
como quien busca sonrisas
como quien ve en el cielo
su reflejo volar.

Saluda la brisa
una luna vecina
asoma su aroma
para poder conquistar
mi luz y su prisa
mi sincera obscuridad.

Deja que entre
déjala tocar
que de ella también dependen
las sombras del hogar,
coexisten infieles
tejiendo en sus redes
la sucia verdad
aquella que descubrí un viernes
en el impulcro bar
donde decidiste tus manos
por fin enseñar.

Dejar la luz entrar
que entre las ramas se cuele
la paz de saberte
desnudo en mi frente
para por primera vez verte
en tus rodillas temblar
temeroso de ti mismo
apaciguado, solo un niño
inmerso y absuelto
en tu propia obscuridad.

15128824_10154252202264285_6371174771330677380_o

“Dejar la luz entrar”, autoría propia. 

Tantra

Take my hand
feel the warm
can you hear the blood
running through my mind
drowning all my thoughts
hunger of desire

Oh take my hand
I don’t even know you
I don’t care about your name
just give me what I told you
help me to forget
what night has taught me
amnesia for the best

‘Cause when the crowd is jumping
nobody sees my face
when the sun is rising slowly
and I have lost my sense
perhaps I’m going under
or just getting insane

Take my hand
while the lights are blinding us
use our bodies to guide the way
the sweat and the salt, they judge us
but at the end everyone is the same
slaves of lust and fire

Oh take my past
and throw it away
you don’t need to know my story
we are here just to slay
this dance floor and your bed
every corner, every threat

‘Cause when the crowd is jumping
nobody sees my face
when the sun is rising slowly
and I have lost my sense
perhaps I’m going under
or just getting insane

‘Cause when the crowd is exploding
you and I have raised hell
our sins are full of glory
so don’t expect me to regret
perhaps I’m going under
or just fully insane

ohhh the night ain’t good
ohhh the night ain’t bad
this darkness is spreading
my intentions of despair
our bodies our salvation
the sweat takes all away
take my hand and my shadow
destroy my innocence

‘Cause when the crowd is jumping
nobody sees my face
when the sun is rising slowly
and I have lost my sense
perhaps I’m going under
or just getting insane
if love is a crime
I declare myself unfair
just want you for an hour
or maybe a little less

ohhh the night ain’t good
ohhh the night ain’t bad

 

cross2

“Tantra Cross” by Unknown artist.

More to Life (Interlude)

Ohhh

the night ain’t good
ohhh
the night ain’t bad
there are no absolutes
I’m no longer afraid
Ohhh
Some just pray to gods
others say goodbye
someone told me to survive
but there’s gotta be more to life
ohhh
Ohhh
the night is good
Ohhh
the night is bad
there is no reason to cry
there’s gotta be more to life
than just waiting for the dead

Roses

We were in the middle of the road
watching at each other throw the past forever
your eyes crossed into mine
surrounded by city lights
I guess I fell in love.
 
We tried to build our castles in the sand
we thought honesty was all we had
I used to love watching you sleep
in the middle of our lies.
 
[Chorus]
 
‘Cause we were roses
so temporary high
we were closer
we saw into each others eyes
we had our garden
now it’s over
every thorn caused so much trouble
when we were roses
into each others hands.
 
(Oh oh ohhhhh, oh oh ohhhh)
 
We were partners in crime
when we kidnapped forbidden time
We had our secrets,
something to hide.
 
We knew our love was poison
with every kiss we made it better
thought it was enough to keep it together
we messed up destiny
into this lovers felony.
 
[Chorus]
 
‘Cause we were roses
so temporary high
we were closer
we saw into each others eyes
we had our garden
now it’s over
every thorn caused so much trouble
when we were roses
into each others hands.
 
[Bridge]
 
Somehow I knew it from the start
this love was never gonna last
like a one-day flower
we were supposed to die.
 
‘Cause we were roses
so temporary high
we were roses
used to believe there was a chance
but we were roses
we were meant to fade apart.
 
‘Cause we were roses
so temporary high
we were closer
we saw into each others withered eyes
we had our garden
now it’s over
every thorn caused so much trouble
when we were roses
into each others hands.
rose-meditative

“Rose Meditative” by Salvador Dalí, 1958.

La ausencia

Busqué la paz
busqué respuestas
en otros brazos hallar la certeza
cocí mis alas
para obligarme a volar
encontré cenizas donde antes
era tu lugar.
 
No quedan sombras
tan siquiera promesas
las palabras se borraron
se esfumó la tristeza
solo queda
la ausencia.
 
A él le faltaba su vista
a mí la inocencia
él ocupaba a la lluvia
y yo una sonrisa honesta
a él le sobraban caricias
a mí me faltabas tú
agonía a contraluz.
 
Y qué más da si no te interesa
el tiempo se encargó
de esclarecer las tinieblas
hasta la fe se me agotó
y en mis maletas empaqué este dolor
me largué unas mil noches
lejos de tu olor
a otra órbita
otra dimensión.
20161006_230330

“Self portrait I”. Autoría propia. 

Resaca

Se me asoma la resaca
restos de una noche extinta
marcas en mi piel que me anuncian
los vestigios del pudor.

Un camino por donde antes
las lágrimas hicieron trillo
se encuentra seco en la piel
muerto de sed.

Y el arrepentimiento llega
en un tren tardío
en la estación equivocada
y con un aire frío.

Porque no,
no se siente
no llega a mi alma
la paciencia
la redención;
no llega a mi alma
el último trago de whisky
el cigarro oscuro
se quema en el lienzo
de mi falta de consciencia
y el viento me trae
el recuerdo de su voz.

Se me asoma una jaqueca
en un domingo sin rostro
leo el destino en mis manos
mientras Blavatsky espera en el rincón.

Sentir el frío, el calor
sentir otras piernas en mi regazo
encadenar a la inocencia por un rato
simplemente no tengo pasado
jamás existió.

magritte-clairvoyant

“Clairvoyant” por René Magritte, 1936. 

 

Los excesos

Y si lo pienso dos veces
la ansiedad me mata
galopante se anuncia
la desesperación.
Y el reloj camina
con sus manecillas necias
torcida avanza
la desolación.
Los excesos.
Malditos encuentros.
Desatan la lujuria
alimentan la pasión.
Si perdí fue por idiota
el perdón no avanza
pero si lo hago yo
gana la ambición.
Y el violín me llora
nostalgia aflora
melancolia etérea
anoréxica ilusión.
Los excesos.
Se funde mi abrazo
Me alejo, me alejo yo
Silencio, superstición.